Things get darker, and lighter.
Sometimes my flashbacks take me over entirely.
I spent last night in a cat and mouse with some kind of sentient interdimensional catfish, chasing through water, mountains, halls and sky. All four of my limbs were alternately cramping and going numb, as I tried to set them into and out of the covers. It was an incredibly uncomfortable, painful night.
It's a wonder I feel rested at all today, but I am curiously intrigued.
Many times, I am not sure where I am from, or where I am going.
This is a rare admission of the personal dislocation I live in.
Sometimes, if I seem a little disoriented, just keep in mind, that I am not entirely sure where I am from to begin with. Besides a part of Texas, that does not belong in Texas.
Sometimes there's a lot of ugly, sometimes a lot of beautiful.
When you decide to take the high ground, there's a lot of people think it belongs to them already.
People like me, little people with big ideas and big hearts, we end up cannon fodder, if we aren't smart about it. We end up diving into the meat grinder, with good intentions.
I so often feel like some kind of space alien, with knowledge from another planet, looking for a leader to talk to.
I have yet to find a rational group with something resembling national leverage.
There are so many divisions, so many delusions, so many different directions.
I feel the same way, in my personal life, but then I always have.
America's idea is that you sell out, to get by.
I have managed to get by without selling out, but I also work my ass off.
I have found the limit, and I have found the wall.
Perhaps I can forge it a little deeper, but this level of influence, is not enough for me.
I change things, life by life, but I would like a more organizational approach.
I am not satisfied, by any means, by any organization I currently belong to, though I am encouraged.
What the hell do I do with that..